In a rut...

[Harold Krisna]

WARNING,LONG RANT!
How do you all deal with "the band rut"? Oct. will mark my 30th year of being in bands.Everything from local hero's to garage zeros. I've had the "rut" before,took a few times to recognize it as such...
My last band lasted 5 years,luckily, we all left each other on good terms(has not always ended that way,if'n ya know what i mean..),this new band has really only been together about 6 weeks,took a few months to get players together with the right vision,chemistry,and all that crap. Hell, half the band are guys from the last band!
Whats that? back up,and what do i mean by "band rut"? You've never put all you're energy into getting a unit started,picking just the right songs,people,style,getting it all going good,and then just hating the whole thing?,and realizing it's all in you're head,and yours alone?
I've always been the band leader,boss,whatever you wanna call it,because I've got the most talent? HAHAHAHA! no,'cause I'm the guy that'll deal with making all the phone calls when one guy calls off,or deal with booking venues,etc.
When i ended the last band,(because of a HUGE case of rut..),knowing it was me,i quit several vises(pot,booze,still working on smokes...),dieted and so far lost 50 pounds,and getting my health back on track,figuring all that was screwing with my head, ... no luck,(god! I'd kill for a joint right now,lol)
Yeah, i' thought of at least taking a break,and not having a band for awhile,but even the wife(who has graciously put up with all of it for 22 years),pointed out the last time i did that,'bout a decade ago,i was a miserable son of a bitch....
I have a great crew,lots of talent there,good people. good tunes,nothing to complain about. still all i see is the imperfections....
from past experience,i know that in a month or 2, a little switch in my head will click,and I'll enjoy this again.
No, i don't really expect any answers,but it helps to type it out and get it off my chest.
Thanks for the bandwidth,
Harold